It seems about the only thing more stupid than the 946 word article about bringing consistency to the UNC-CH school colors and logos and the presentation thereof on today’s sports page of The News & Observer is writing about it in this space. There’s vomit all over my computer screen from reading the story and then writing about it. Usually those types of stories are skipped but this time suffering was on purpose.
Thank goodness, better yet, thank God the program in Chapel Hill cares as much about its appearance than it does its academics and throws good time after bad developing its brand. The uniformity of its uniforms will take attention away from no-show classes and plagiarized academic papers and the NCAA penalties to come. The color/style project was a joint venture between Nike, the primary sponsor of all things Tar Heels, and the UNC athletics department, thankfully and supposedly at no additional cost to UNC athletics. It would be a shame if they had cut a tutor or two to pay for the softball team to have the same on-the-field appearance as the rowing team. Mark my word: You can hire all the defensive coaching geniuses you wish, but it will be the uniforms that makes UNC's football defense better.
The effort took 18 months of hard labor, just a fraction of the time the NCAA has been investigating the football and basketball programs, but in the end, using its primary colors of baby blue and white along with navy blue, black and metallic silver, the project is complete and the story has been reported. With the new color scheme, with that baby blue shade consistent on every UNC uniform, the world is no doubt a better and safer place. Gag me!
The newspaper report today was extremely detailed by writer Andrew Carter. He quoted UNC Athletics Director Bubba Cunningham, a representative of Nike, famous designer Alexander Julian, and promotional videos that lead up to the exciting and earth shattering announcement. The videos ended promoting “Our Blue!” (Imagine the play on words opponents will use at just the right time.) In the future, we’re pretty sure reporters (and there are many) who love to see UNC win every time out will skirt when the Tar Heels lose by writing, “UNC may have lost the game but they sure looked good in those new uniforms.”
Dictionary.com word of the day
gauche (noun) [gohsh]: lacking social polish; tactless